donor insemination

Honesty Over Ease: Why I Won’t Avoid the Daddy Question – Single Mum, Parents Article

As a single mother by choice I expected the “Who’s the daddy?” question to come up. I’ve actually been surprised at the restraint people have shown when I’ve told them I’m expecting while not wearing a ring and still going by Miss. Sure, in some ways it’s none of people’s business, but as someone who is at times overly inquisitive herself, I understand it’s also natural to wonder. Since I’ve been so open throughout my journey to single motherhood, I…

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A New Beginning?? | Single Mothers by Choice – Single Mum, Parents Article

Here’s what I want. I want a baby. I am 39 years old. I am single. I have never been in a long term relationship. I am facing the reality that it is just not going to happen for me in time to have a baby. I have always wanted kids. When I was a kid I wanted to be a mom. I used to love to babysit. I don’t so much love babies, per se, as kids. I am…

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To Be or Not to Be a Single Mother by Choice (SMC) – Single Mum, Parents Article

There are many reasons TO become a Single Mother by Choice (SMC) and many reasons NOT TO. It’s such an individual decision to make. It is difficult to be a single mom, very difficult, but I think it’s also difficult to be a married mom. This decision isn’t one to be taken lightly, and it helps to really look at your whole life while you decide whether being a SMC will fit into it. When I was thinking I worried…

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My Only Regret is That I Waited So Long – Single Mum, Parents Article

I’ve always wanted to have children, always wanted to mother. I’ve been an au pair to other families, spent time with all of the kids of friends and family. I hoped and assumed, of course, that I would have a family of my own when the time came. I suppose that’s the tricky part – that time thing. Like many, I’ve been in a series of long relationships that have not withstood the tests of time. A long medical training…

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Dreams | Single Mothers by Choice – Single Mum, Parents Article

Sometimes I reflect on my life over the years. 15 years, probably more, that I have fought for what I want, for what I believe. I guess in a way motherhood and dating go hand in hand, since my whole life I believed that one was the means to another. My mother tells me that I have always believed that what I wanted, what I desired was out there. She admired my persistence and fight that it could be real…

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Why I Am Taking the Leap – Single Mum, Parents Article

1. I am sick of living my life for myself, i.e. clothes, jewelry, facials, massages etc. 2. I love spending time with my niece and nephew, i.e. playground, zoo, reading books, bathing, feeding etc. 3. I am scared of getting old and being alone. 4. I have so much love to give, but no child to give it to. 5. I want the mother-child bond; I want to feel needed. 6. I hate holidays, get-togethers etc. because I am the…

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Contentedness and Complacency | Single Mothers by Choice – Single Mum, Parents Article

Profound Thoughts on Starting IVF #2 I have this feeling that my life is going to change. I think the start of every IVF brings this feeling. I remember it last time. Which brings me to profound thoughts about happiness and change. For those of you who have never met me, or never knew me before I was trying to conceive (TTC), I’m generally a happy person. And even as a child, I was a “resilient” child. I have faced…

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The Cat’s Out of the Bag – Single Mum, Parents Article

When I was pregnant and finally told people (or let my mother tell people), I got the most amazing phone calls. My mom told her sister and I swear within minutes, I got calls from both her sons, my first cousins, telling me that this would be the most amazing journey of my life and the best thing I could do. When I started to tell my friends, they were uniformly supportive. One friend called her brother who called me…

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Motherhood — Part 2 | Single Mothers by Choice – Single Mum, Parents Article

(This is the second half of Motherhood. The first half recently appeared in this space.) If I decide to become a single mother, I would probably also be deciding that my child would be an only child. Not only would s/he not have a father, but also it would be just the two of us. Going it alone would be hard enough financially and mentally, so thinking about a second on my own is probably not in the cards. Some…

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I wrote to my donor – Single Mum, Parents Article

This has been niggling at me for a while, so I sent a card to the clinic last month and asked them to forward it. I didn’t include my contact details and explained that I didn’t want to strike up contact, just to say thanks. I also wanted to mention the heart thing to him, just in case it’s a problem on his side. I don’t know if contact is permitted at this stage and there’s a chance he hasn’t…

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